Realities & Blessings...

Happy Friday, everyone! We've done it...we've made it through another week. This one felt very long to me for some reason...perhaps due to sleep deprivation. But anyways, I am really looking forward to this weekend. There calling for sunshine and warmth and we plan to do some outside work and some gardening.

So let's get to it: the part of the week where I mentally turn the realities of my life into blessings so that I can enter the weekend with a fresh perspective. And this week I'm sharing with you the rest of the pics from a mini session I had with my girls on Friday night {the others I shared in Wednesday's post}.

Reality: After resisting for nearly I year, I have caved and joined Facebook. As if I really need another social media addiction {I am already a Flickr addict and a blog junkie!}, I now have yet another place to go and waste time that I do not have.

Blessing: You know, it really is kind of neat. And as soon as it's newness wears off, I'm sure I'll be able to exhibit a little more self control. I'm getting to chat with siblings and cousins as well as members of my growing online network of friends. It's deepening my relationships all over the place and I like that! Plus, Maya is teething again so we are not sleeping at night and she is nursing way more during the day...so what else is a sleepy mama strapped to a baby and chair to do? If you're on FB and you haven't found me yet, please do so!

Reality: I really {as in REALLY} need to get some organizational systems in place. I'm just not an organized person and I need some new routines that enable me to manage all my tasks.
Blessing: My chaotic life is a great motivator to get some new working systems in place. Rayne will be done with school in a few weeks and I'll be able to begin some new routines and habits and hopefully streamline a few of the processes going on around here. We are also having a huge yard sale here in a few weeks and I think the purging of a lot of bulk and excess will pave the way for more simplified living. So even though big changes have not been made around here yet, they are coming!

Reality: I had my very first portrait session this week and I made quite a few elementary mistakes. I was nervous and therefore felt too quiet to ask for poses and such right off the bat. I'm very used to just quietly following my kids around, snapping photos constantly...they barely even notice the camera between them and me. I really had to pull back and remember that I had to communicate with my subjects a bit more and not just snap constant pictures. It's an adjustment that is going to take time getting used to. I'm way more comfortable with shooting people as they are than trying to pose them.
Blessing: My first experience went rather well for any portrait session...let alone my first! Sharon and her family were so easy to work with and it really helped that we are friends and already comfortable with each other. The experience was so important and I've really seen that I want to continue practicing portraits outside my family so that I can get better and hopefully start doing them professionally at some point. Honestly, the whole experience was one big blessing! {btw...thank you sooooo much for all your kind words on the sneak peek! You guys made me feel wonderful!}

Well, I'm tired and I'm really ready to wrap up this week and start working towards the weekend. I'd love it if you joined in on the R&B fun...if you do, please link back here and feel free to leave your link in the comments!

Have a great weekend, friends! I hope to be by sometime...to say hello if nothing else. But if not, I'll see you Monday with the rest of Sharon's maternity photos!

Realities & Blessings {at the fountain}...

Hi everyone! It seemed like this week was super long and then it was over in a blink...I know, really contradictory, right? But that's just how it was. But I'm here again for this weeks Realities & Blessings...because even when things aren't great, they still kind of are!

So here we go...   {oh, and the girls and I stopped by our town water fountain after story time at the library this week and I snapped some pics (of course) so they'll be your backdrop this week}

Reality: There was an afternoon this week when I was just a little on edge over something or another and sort of went off on a {pretty loud and semi graphic} tangent on the laundry and my husband's lack of actually completing a wash-dry-fold cycle including a statement on how he most likely just keeps pulling out one pair of underwear a day and closes it all back up. As soon as I had wound down from said tangent, the poor unassuming mail carrier knocked on my door, needing me to sign for an express package. Great. Most likely she heard every word and was just waiting for me to finish to knock. Or worse, she did knock and I didn't hear her over my ranting.

Blessing: You know, every time I witness someone else doing this exact same thing, I just smile and thank God that I'm not alone. I like to think that maybe the mail carrier perhaps feels a little better about her own possible laundry/husband tantrums. Okay, but more than that....it was humbling. And honestly, I think we all need a little humbling from time to time.

Reality: I'm having trouble connecting with Layla as of late. She has hit the point where she needs some additional stimulation besides what Maya and I can provide for her while Rayne is at school. Unfortunately, this has occurred near the end of the school year and, although we'll put her in preschool next year, we just have to make the best of things for now. Layla is not as engaging and verbal as Rayne and it's sometimes difficult for me to know exactly what she needs or what she would like. It takes additional effort on my part to sift through her complicated little self and get to the root of things.

Blessing: Layla, through and through has made, and continues to make me, a better mother. Rayne will say what she wants, ask for what she needs, and let you know when she's upset about something. With Layla, I need to pay closer attention and learn to give without her asking. It's a challenge, but I love her for it! The whole experience is stretching me as a mother and as a human being.

Reality: I had a long week of multiple computer frustrations and aggravations, not to mention a huge investment of my time and a big ole learning curve that I am not yet through...all in the name of expanding my knowledge, abilities, and capabilities. Honestly, as I learned through starting my soap business, nothing is ever easy. And every time you'd like to do one thing, you have to learn how to do eight others.
Blessing: As frustrating as this week may have been, next week will be easier and the week after that even more so. I am, in fact, expanding my knowledge, abilities, and capabilities and that is a very good thing!

Reality: I felt super exposed this week as I posted my first video blog {do they still call them vlogs?}. I wanted {and still kind of do} to take it down many, many times! Had I not had a significant amount of time {and a bit of money} invested in posting it, trust me I would have deleted the whole thing!
Blessing: You were all so very, very sweet to me...and to my crazy dog! And so many of you said that my words helped you feel less alone in your creative journeys. And, really, that means the WORLD to me! That is really what I had hoped for in posting that and I'm happy to know that is spoke to some of you! Thank you for all your kind words and for making me feel so good! I will most definitely do another one...only perhaps not as long.

Alrighty, folks...that's what I've got today! If you'd like to play along, please link back here and leave your link in the comments.

I have something very special planned for Mother's Day so I will see you sometime over the weekend!

Realities & Blessings...

Hello & Happy Friday!!!! What?, you ask. Two R&B's in one week? Yes, I know...it's invigorating. Well, not really. But after today we'll be back on schedule and that, my friends, is invigorating.

So, without further ado...

Reality: I officially spent the bulk of my week cleaning up dog messes. The big dog came around quite quickly, but the little one had a rough time shaking that nasty bug. He's 11 yrs. old and he has chronic allergies which makes everything hit him just a little harder.

Blessing: The biggest blessing is that it's OVER! He is finally eating and everything seems to be working properly. The bonus blessing is that any residual guilt I may have been harboring over not bringing anything to the financial table has completely vanished. I am now 100% convinced that I more than earn my keep around here!

Reality: I've been in a creative slump for about three weeks now. I've been dispassionate about photography, editing, & writing...all the things that typically bring me so much joy and fulfilment. Although I know full well that this is all just a part of the creative process, I'm really getting frustrated and grumpy over it none-the-less.
Blessing: It's right about the time that you're coming out of these creative slumps that you realize you've been in one. And I'm happy to report that I do see some signs that I'm rounding the creative corner. {YAAAYYY!!!} Also, my time spent in the underbelly of the creative flow reminded me that I owe you a post on the creative cycle. A while back I posted the first in a two part series on Fostering Creativity and I neglected to post the second. So, I think {hopefully} I'm going to do a video blog on the topic because I have a lot to say and I never get the time to type that much {with both of my hands}. So that will be exciting! Also, my creative slump allowed me a big opportunity to plug away at some of the boring less creative tasks involved with opening up my print shop! So I'm hoping to get that up and running next week!

Reality: Due to all the busy-ness, lack of sleep, and overall unpleasantness going on around here this past week, I re-fueled and pepped up with raunchy, calorically overloaded, sugar coated foods...and lots of them.  I really think that after spending the weekend at my brother's {who happens to make the BEST chicken enchiladas...of which I ate plenty to cover servings for all of us!} and stuffing my face with junk this week that I have easily gained a minimum of five to seven pounds. The part that really bothers me is that I feel like I've spent a week eating nothing but junk: sluggish, bloated, blah!
Blessing: I found solace and a much needed sugar rush in more than one bag of chocolate covered pretzels and a pack of EL Fudge cookies. And, you know what, at the end of the day when you're juggling three kids and two sick dogs, you need to get your jollies wherever you can! And if some weeks that's a bag of marshmallows, then so be it!

Alright... I am ready to leave this week behind me and head on into better days! Did you like the inclusion of all the "dog"wood pictures...get it? I'm trying to re-associate the word dog with nicer images! I'd love it if you joined in on the R&B fun...if you do, please link back here and leave your link in the comments!

I'm very excited about some things I have planned for next week. In honor of my print shop opening up, next week will be full of fun and creativity and maybe even a giveaway!

Have a great weekend, everyone!!!

Realities & Blessings {On A Monday}...

I really would have just skipped a week of R&B...really. Because I'm trying to let go a little...of things that aren't necessary. But trust me when I tell you that this practice is 100% necessary today. I am in great need of finding some blessings today before I drown in a sea of self pity. And for goodness sake, if friends like Laurie {who is battling lymphoma} and Hyacynth {who just lost her father} can find blessings in their realities, then I can certainly find them in mine.

Reality: We have had some long weeks here as of late. Brent has worked a six day week, followed by a day of school out of town. It had been a hard couple of weeks for us, having little time to re-gain our footing.
Blessing: As a result of his long week, Brent had a day off through the week. We surprised Rayne at school and we all went for a picnic lunch in the park with lots of time to run loose on the playground. It was such a nice break from all the crazy business we'd been having. The weather was perfect and we had the whole place to ourselves. It is seriously my happy place right now and I'm including a lot of pictures from that day in this post!

Reality: We went away this weekend to visit my brother and his family. The dogs went to the kennel for the weekend and came home with stomach bugs. We were looking forward to a restful evening last night and a good night's sleep to make up for the total lack of sleep we all got on our trip. However, we spent almost the whole night {and now I am spending the entire day} cleaning up dog messes of every kind all over the place. Two dogs + two stomach bugs = a LOT of messes. On top of my already overwhelming to-do list, including tackling the laundry from last week that did not get done while we were away, I had to make a quick trip to the vet and am scrubbing floors like every 30 minutes.
Blessing: At least it is the two dogs and not the three kids with massive stomach bugs. A little floor scrubbing here and there cannot be as bad as complete bed and clothing changes every 30 minutes. Plus, it's a really good exercise in letting go. {see next reality}

Reality: I came here last week, completely overwhelmed with the duties of my life, asking for your organizational tips. I was really feeling lost, frustrated, unmotivated. By Friday evening of last week, I had completely worn myself out and was feeling physically ill as a result.
Blessing: I'm learning to slow down and let go...and really getting some good opportunities to practice that. You all gave me such amazing support and advice and what I really kept hearing over and over was "let it go, be with your kids, this is just a phase." And you are so right. You also gave me a lot of really great concrete tips which I'm going to take some time and think about to try to come up with some systems that might work well around here. You should really go back and read through the comments & suggestions. They're incredible. Thank you!

Reality: The girls have swim lessons three nights this week and three nights next week. Add that to the one night of dance class they have every week and, yes that's right, we have four nights of quick dinners and running out for the next two weeks. I love our lazy evenings and after dinner walks and I will miss that time for us all to relax and connect at the end of our days.

Blessing: On a day like today, I am super excited about the prospect of getting out for a bit this evening and getting a whole 45 minutes to read or write or {most importantly} to not clean up dog messes! These two weeks come at a really good time as I am in need of some mental space to figure some things out and develop some game plans. Sure, it's no leisurely me time at a coffee shop with some sort of sinfully expensive coffee drink in front of me...but hey, I'll take what I can get!

Wow...there really is power in positive thinking! When I started this post {which was, granted, two hours ago} I was really not doing well; there was yelling, ranting, going off on tangents, waiting rather impatiently for Brent to get home, etc... But I really am feeling much better. Thank you for allowing me an impromtu Monday edition of Realities & Blessings...I really needed it!

Realities & Blessings...

Reality: I was very excited to get an opportunity to write this post this evening. But I'm now feeling a little queasy {just overwhelmed and super tired, I think!} and I have to pack as we are going away for the weekend. So, I'm going to skip this week...but maybe I'll post one on Sunday night when we get back.
Blessing: I know that ya'll understand...you're so great like that! God always makes you slow down when you refuse to do it yourself, right?! Plus, I'll get a nice early bedtime tonight...which is always great!

Have a great weekend, everyone! I will see you on Sunday!

Realities & Blessings, More Spring Blossoms, and A GIVEAWAY...

Happy Friday, friends! We did...we made it through another week. Although for me these days, the weeks are going much too fast. I'm having a hard time digesting the fact that in a little over a month, Rayne will be finishing her Kindergarten year. It seems crazy. It all flew by in a blink.

Anyway, that's really a whole other topic and one I'm sure you get sick of hearing me talk about. But it is Friday, and around here that means Realities & Blessings where I look back at my week, turn my cons into pros, and get a fresh start for the weekend. I had a tough time this week coming up with realities...really. I'm really pretty happy. And in the face of what some others are going through, I feel insanely blessed. But you can always come up with something that's not perfect, right? And I think that the practice of turning things around is one worth continuing so that when things are rougher, tougher, and maybe not so good, that the underlying blessings will be easier to find.

Reality: I've lost my Spring fever. I know what you're thinking: last week I want to get over my Spring fever, this week I want it back...make up my mind, right?! But I miss that carefree, relaxed feeling that I had. The kids have lost theirs too...the whole newness and excitement of being outside again has worn off and now their afraid of the bees and bored with our toys.
Blessing: It is nice to get the housework done from time to time. And without the kids pestering me to go out all the time, I'm more likely to stay inside and chip away and the ever growing piles of laundry and paperwork that needs to be done. And missing those Spring fever feelings encourages me to open the windows, take pictures, hang clothes on the line...anything to get just a piece of it back.

Reality: I have found myself saying on more than one occasion this week that all I wanted was a clear head and two free hands.
Blessing: I am never {as in not ever} bored. What's more, I have become incredibly good at utilizing small chunks of time and typing left handed.

Reality: Rayne reads fluently. {that is not the reality~that is all blessing~stay with me} She is now privy to the overabundance of propaganda and written advertisements that pervade our society. Up until this point, I have been happy that all of that hasn't been a part of her world. Rayne is easily persuaded by suggestion. At Wendy's for lunch the other day, Rayne tried to convince me that she should most definitely be topping off her lunch with a chocolate frosty. "But see here," she says "it's impossible not to smile while eating a frosty!" It said so right on her cup!
Blessing: She reads! The girls reads all the time and extremely well! She read the word 'impossible' for goodness sake! And she's reading chapter books and story books, reading herself to sleep, reading to her sisters...and that is ALL blessing! I'm just going to have to explain the whole economy thing to her now!

Reality: Although I had intended to have my print shop up and running by now, I just haven't gotten the opportunity to begin the long process of setting it all up. It seems easy to just list my prints...but it's actually quite time consuming to determine which prints to sell at which sizes and prices and then writing a description for them and figuring shipping costs. It's definitely something I want to work on...but definitely not something I can do in one of those aforementioned small chunks of time.
Blessing: My time is being spent in better places: "listening" to and being present with my kids and caring for our home. Plus, my lack of focused drive in setting this shop up signifies to me that I am content; that I'm happy being where I am in photography and in life. And while I don't want to shy away from bigger goals, I also don't think it's a bad thing to feel good at any certain stage and take my time moving on from it.

Reality: I spilled a lot here this week. I got all kinds of real and messy about the ups and downs of motherhood. While I like to keep things as honest as possible in this space, I usually keep it pretty light.
Blessing: You guys were warm and compassionate. You made me feel understood and not alone. I am so  grateful for that. And I can only hope that my writing and sharing of these real and messy parts of my life will help someone else get through the real and messy parts of theirs.

Okay, now for the fun part! My 300th post is just two posts away and I feel like celebrating! I'm giving away a copy of the Spring issue of Artful Blogging magazine {in which I am featured} and also a Spring blossom 5x7 print of your choosing. You may pick any one of the spring blossom pictures from this R&B post or from last Friday's post. All you have to do to enter is leave a comment on this post. And if you post your own R&B post and link back here, you can get an extra entry. I will choose one lucky winner randomly on Monday, April 19th.

Happy Friday, everyone!!!

Realities & Blessings {& Spring Blossoms}...

Here we are again for another week's worth of Realities & Blessings...it's my little way of looking back on the week's challenges and putting them in a positive light. I love how it helps my enter the weekend with a fresh perspective.

This week, I thought I'd share some images of my favorite pieces of Spring with you...buds & blossoms!

Reality: Nap times in this house are currently in a state of unrest {pun very much intended}. We had been feeling that Rayne was ready to give up her afternoon nap. But Layla, who is not ready to give hers up, is very much sure she is. Not only are my kiddos tired and a bit crazy, but changes in schedule are often difficult for me and upseting to our normal flow.
Blessing: They infamous 'they' are always saying that change is good. Where I say that the jury may still be out on that one, it is good to assess patterns and make changes where necessary. This shift in Rayne's schedule will allow me to spend a little more time with her and it will give her some opportunities to unwind alone...without the 'entertainment' of Layla. We will all soon find our new normals and get back into a new predictable flow.

Reality: Layla is turning four...FOUR...tomorrow. You know how I feel about birthdays and my sweet babies getting older. And if you don't know...I happen to dislike the whole aging process greatly when it comes to the kids.
Blessing: Layla really is turning into a good little girl...a fun, funny, beautiful little girl. She is definitely not a baby any more and I really love the little lady she is turning out to be!

Reality: As a part of my constant need to learn more and more about the art and skill of photography, I started shooting in RAW...it doesn't compress the files, as it does with jpegs, and as a result, you gain more editing control. This has not only come with a whole new learning curve, but also a whole new set of things I must learn and adjustments I must make because these files are much bigger and behave differently than traditional image files. It has been yet another uncomfortable, uncertain, and frustrating growth period which also resulted in the loss of some very loved magnolia image files.
Blessing: I can shoot in RAW!!!!! Great hardships reap great rewards. I really do love the editing options that this format allows. I have now figured out most of the logistics of what needs to happen. I have re-assessed my photo storage options and come up with what I feel are inherently better solutions. And, I went back to the park and re-took those magnolia images that I loved and lost.

Reality: I have been having a very hard time lately keeping up with life's responsibilities. I feel overwhelmed and unorganized while at the same time feeling very lazy. I have Spring fever in a bad way and all I really want to do is play outside and take pictures.
Blessing: My primary job in life is to take care of my children. And lucky for me, all they want to do is play outside. Sooooo...I have a really good excuse reason for falling behind in my other duties. Unfortunately, this has also made me a bad blog friend as of late...and for that I do apologize! I hope my Spring fever cools off a bit soon and I can resume normal functioning levels...probably!

So, there you have it, another week's worth of Realities & Blessings. I am super excited that so many of you have decided to join in! Please link back here and feel free to leave your link in the comments of this post!

I will see you tomorrow for another of my 30 Lists; 30 Things I Love About Layla...the birthday gal! Aaannnddd...you'll get to see a bunch of the photos from her session last Friday!

Happy Friday, dear friends!

Realities & Blessings...

Hi everyone! Just one R&B today...

Reality: I have not felt like being on the computer at all this week. The little bit I have has felt forced and labored...even now: I miss you all and I have tons to say, I just don't feel like saying it right now.
Blessing: Breaks are good. They are refreshing and necessary. I was incredibly fortunate to have three beautifully written guest posts written for this week so I was able to take a little break from here. And it's feeling good! I might be back tomorrow to post my C&C assignment, but it's possible that I will just take the weekend off as well.

I thank you so much for showing my guests so much love this week! And welcome, welcome to those of you who may have found me from one of those lovely ladies!

I hope you all are finding ways to refresh and renew as well...'tis the season! Happy Friday!

Realities & Blessings {& Ranunculus}...

Oh my how I have grown to love this little Friday post! I feel so much like it allows me to look back a my week and leave my emotional baggage at the proverbial doorstep before entering the weekend. It's refreshing and it really puts me in a good place as far as perspective and direction.

So, here we go again...because even when things aren't wonderful, they still kind of are...and I thought I'd share some pictures of these beautiful yellow Ranunculus that I was lucky enough to find at the grocery store yesterday!

Reality: I recently invested some of my shop liquidation money into a new macro lens for my camera. For those of you not familiar with photography terms, a macro lens allows you to get very close to your subject and take those extremely close-up detailed shots. As I am a student, self-teaching and guiding my way through this big and vast world of photography, this new lens presented this whole new world of things to learn. I felt like a total newbie all over again with this new lens, fumbling my way through shots and settings...to say that this period was uncomfortable would be a dramatic understatement. I felt frustrated and multiple times I quit on myself and threw my old lens back on my camera just to feel at home again.
Blessing: This experience with the new lens, along with all its uncomfortable growth, forced me to throw myself into photography textbooks and online learning tools...something which I had wanting to be doing anyway but hadn't taken the time to do. I moved past my comfort zone, learned more about the technical aspects of photography, and am finding my groove with my new lens. This experience, that was so hard and frustrating at first, has taken me to the next level and helped me to become better. Amen to that!

Reality: Maya is cutting three teeth simultaneously; one of her top front ones and her two top eye teeth. Anyone who has kiddos knows that those eye teeth are buggers! She is not sleeping well, totally clingy, fussy at all times, and using me as a teether sometimes as she's nursing {ouch!}. I am tired and worn out and I've gotten nothing done this week as a result.
Blessing: I'm typically a big broken record when it comes to talking about how fast time goes by and how quickly the babies grow up. I'll be darned if I'm going to sit here and not find it to be a blessing that Maya has wanted some extra cuddles and love this week. Very soon, this whole teething business will be a vague memory and Maya will know that I am here for her in good times and bad.

Reality: I want a day off. Like bad. Like a whole day; not a couple hours or an evening...A WHOLE DAY. I have a ton of personal stuff to get done like some orders to get out, some emails to answer, some creative work I've been dying to do, some non-kid music to listen to, some bubble baths to take and legs to shave...you know, the stuff that isn't absolutely necessary so it gets shoved aside. Mostly, I would just like some time to think...to actually complete a mental thought or two. To get things sorted and situated and thought out in my own mind. And the real reality here is that it's not going to happen. Not a couple hours, not an evening, and most certainly not a whole day.
Blessing: {I had to work at this one, friends...really. Because I want this so bad I could literally cry} There was a time in my life, a very lonely time, when I had loads of time and not a lot of people in my life to spend it with. I would not trade my crazy life and my fuzzy head for that any day...even if it meant a whole day off!

Reality: I'd like to take some 4 year portraits of Layla {her birthday is coming up in a couple of weeks}. However, portraits make me all kinds of nervous. They are not my strong suit and I end up getting nervous and edgy and sometimes they go really badly with my kids. Also, as of late, Layla hasn't been the most willing of subjects.
Blessing: Practice makes perfect. In fact, the best way to get better at something is to do it often. And what better way to practice than on my own beautiful children. {easy to say, but I will seriously have to keep repeating this thought in my own head...} Plus, this little session will give me some time to fuss over Layla and help me to be patient and work with her, together utilizing our strengths and working around our weaknesses...skills that will help us not only to get good portraits, but to build a good foundation for our future relationship.

So, there you have it, another week's worth of Realities & Blessings. I am super excited that so many of you have decided to join in! Please link back here and feel free to leave your link in the comments of this post!

Happy Friday, dear friends!

ps...You have until midnight tonight to enter to win one of Barb's beautiful photographic prints or necklace...

Oh, and just because I hate to leave these out...

"And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." ~Anais Nin